I am going to make it through this year, if it kills me.

any proposition written on a cocktail napkin all water stains and olive juice; a means to service the best laid themes of evaporated youth

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"I'm losing the hyphen and keeping the ring"

The past few days have been consumed by something Stephen calls Culture Lung(ing). I assume he means a metaphorical respiration and consumption of all forms of culture; literature, music, film and the greatest of them all, television. In the glorious lens of hindsight, I could have used the unprecedented loneliness, silence and weather to get some work done, mainly writing. It would be oxymoronic to say professionally unemployed, but something akin to fanciful imaginings of being a writer, which in my case would be scribbling nonsensical and somewhat offensive things (which you can read below) on a piece of napkin before I stagger into sleep. I just can't do it lately. I finally have an idea for a vehicle to put my characters into, and some kind of action to careen them flaming over a cliff.

Songs are memories of people we never met or people we no longer recognize.
I'm in the same sinking boat, it's good we both know how to swim. God I hope there is a porno called the FountainHead, although some people think Ayn Rand couldn't be any sexier. Is there is a support group for objectivists? The quest for justice leaves a pile of bodies. Is that democracy, or television. Psh, justice is never televised. Surprise attack always. It is as though kitsch made itself a mayo sandwich before pulling down its pants& blowing out its brains. Quality like that, on white bread. "Motherfucker cannot dress like he's Mardi Gras" my sister talking about a guy wearing a top hat and tails selling newspapers on the street corner. I'm digging you like a fresh grave. You are an honors credit to your race.
Here's some new music. Enjoy

http://www.mediafire.com/?yzhy3zdj5mq

http://www.mediafire.com/?in2vnmtzym0

So, Tell me about yourself

Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.

A miner in the landfills of a cultural wasteland. Yep, that's a Faustian Beanie Babie.

Lying in bed last night I started composing a chapter, that escaped me the second I woke up. It's a strange feeling, like jumping into a swimming pool but feeling dry.

Advice

A conversation with my sister:

Her: (Things I need to do with my life that I am already aware of)
5 minutes later ...
Me : Or I could get married and have him do it for me.
Her : You could. Norfolk is a Navy town.
Me : Well tell your husband if he sees any skeezy guys, let me fill that void while they are filling that void.
Her : Skeezy guys means skeezy girls. (Pause)
Her : They have nerds in the Navy.

Silence.

Her : I just wanted to make sure all bases are covered, because I'm still not sure what you are into.
Me : I'm hanging up now.

More than C'est La Vie

The Norwegians used to have a concept called svoermere, which meant something sweetly futile or deliciously unprofitable.

Small Miracle: A guy with a small gift gets one of his own on Christmas. A Santaic RomCom, or Porno, whichever.

He's a mystery unto a fabrication. So a liar. Yes, mystery is a sexy word for liar. But people say Im a mystery. Well, when applied to girls its like every bad teenage movie, or at least every teenage boy singing about why x bitch wont fuck his four eyed ass.

You were so full of cock you had no time for questions.

Jewish Nachos

Jewish Nachos - Bagel chips with goat cheese put in microwave. This is how I slum it. Because I kind of wish I had some Spaghettio's right now.

I watched the entire Firefly series this weekend. It made me think of a project I want to do with some people about modern day myths, RE: Persephone being the metaphor for the involvement in the Middle East, shit like that. This is me, slumming it.

Books I've Read Lately:
Confederates in the Attic, Biff the Story of Christ, Bonk - Science Looks at Sex, Vice as Told by NPR. If anybody is interested in reading these, post your address. I need something new to read and my roommate has taken my new Anthony Bourdain book and it may be in his bathroom. I'll take it as a loss.

Here's some insight into why people call me tasteless.

"Like the Craigslist killer taught us, cant we just use the Internet to get laid
and cash,and incarcerated."

Why travel for holidays, guilt trips are free.

The only dream I had about Alec Baldwin was sexual.

Flavored cigarettes, because your taste buds are dead and you are next.

A conversation with my sister, the reason for all round trip guilt trips:

Me: cheer me up, make Bella sing into my answering machine
serrabella2: shes in the tub
me: fucking bath tub loving bitch
serrabella2: how is she my kid?
me: She's not
serrabella2: i always thought my baby was switched
i wouldn't give Bella back though
me: Mother of the year
serrabella2: i wouldn't
me: That's good
I would miss her lyin ass too much anyways.
serrabella2: me too

Anthony: it's always toothless, overweight, no-bra wearing white women who I wouldn't fuck with a stranger's dick, hanging out with the shaddiest-looking dirty motherfuckers on this one corner down the street from our house
me: People who need people.
Anthony: people who need a bullet to the head
me: The story of urban gentrification, told by the GOP

Aim Above Morality

I really wonder how the mail works sometimes.

"You are all the closet space I'll ever need"


The queen is dead, she wont be the first
as the poet jumps from verse to verse
anything to refute the priest
g-d loves the enlightened beast